In September 2009, I decided to begin posting my research into China's orphanages on a subscription blog in order to give myself more flexibility in posting sensitive information such as interviews and recordings with directors, foster families, and others, along with information that I did not feel was appropriate for the public domain. Since then, over a thousand families have joined our project.
Since my first posting on the Fuling orphanage in Chongqing, I have written over fifty articles on a wide variety of topics. We are proud of the body of information that we have published for interested families, most off which would never have been possible under normal circumstances.
So that interested families might better determine if a subscription will be of interest to them, I thought it might be useful to publish a listing of the articles that can be found on our subscription blog. If these articles are of interest to you, please join our blog here.
I have broken the contents of the Subscription Blog down into categories, each with a listing of the articles found under each.
General -- The group of articles discusses topics that are of general interest to adoptive families, including birth parent searching, Chinese culture, orphanage procedures, and other broad topics.
“Where Was My Child Found” (Fuling Orphanage Patterns)
What to Tell – And When (Telling your child their history)
“Modern” Dying Rooms (Dianjiang Orphanage)
Police Reports: Why They're Important & Why They Are Not (How reliable are police reports?)
"The Missing Girls of China" -- David Smolin (Discussion of this important article)
Putting the "Quota" Myth to Bed (Are orphanages limited in how many children they can submit?)
When Problems Come Home (A personal reflection on the changing story of my daughter's finder)
One-on-One Interview with an Orphanage Director (What pressures does an orphanage director face, and how does it impact what adoptive families are told?)
Creative Searching Techniques by Chinese Birth Families (Methods employed by those inside China searching for lost children)
"Feeling, Reason & the Law of China are Contradictory" (Interview with an orphanage director engaged in baby-buying, and how they see the problems facing adoption)
Changing the Birth Dates of Adoptees (How accurate are the birth dates assigned to children?)
Birth Parent Search Results -- LePing, Jiangxi (Summary of our research birht parent search project in one area)
Time to Change the Usual "Story" (Telling our children they were abandoned is, in most cases, inaccurate)
Selective Abortion in China: A Personal Experience (A family friend struggles in dealing with a pregnancy of girl)
A Research Project Ride-Along (How do we know where to go to see success in birth parent searches? What do we look at?)
How & Why an Orphanage Joins the IA Program (What must an orphanage do to join the IA program, and why are there so many that haven't joined?)
The History of China's International Adoption Program (NYU Presentation)
The Wide Cultural Divide (A Chinese blogger that grew up in an orphanage shares some stories that give prospective to the differences in cultural viewpoints)
Love Without Boundaries & the Demographics of China Adoption (We dissect a recent LWB blog article discussing reasons behind the slowdown in Chinese adoptions)
Open Secret: Cash & Coercion in China's IA Program (Forthcoming law review article detailing various aspects of China's adoption program)
Lan's Journal of Life & Research (Part I) (My wife writes about her personal live stories, and how they influence the way she sees her research experiences)
Trafficking -- This group of articles detail and document instances we have discovered of trafficking and other forms of coercion in different orphanages across China.
The CCAA’s Tacit Approval of Trafficking (If the CCAA is against trafficking, why is it still so common? A look at the Hunan scandal court documents sheds light on this question)
"Adoption from China is a 'politically sensitive issue'"
"If you don’t pay any money, how will you find any babies?" (Interview with a Jiangxi director discussing pressures orphanage directors face to procure more children for adoption)
Poyang, Jiangxi: China's New "Orphan Program" (Interview detailing a growing program inside China to recruit children from "poor" or "single parent" homes)
Baby Trafficking Network: Who Sells Babies That Have Not Yet Been Born? -- Part 1 (Chinese undercover investigation into baby brokers, and baby farming inside China)
Baby Trafficking Network: Who Sells Babies That Have Not Yet Been Born? -- Part 2
A "Type and Shadow": The Guixi Orphanage Scandal (What does this recent baby-trafficking story tell us about the program overall?)
Analysis -- Much of our time is spent researching individual orphanages and Provinces. We are well on our way of compiling what we know about each Province, drawing information from the individual orphanages, that participates in China's international adoption program.
A Look at the Provinces I: Chongqing Municipality
A Look at the Provinces II: Jiangxi Province
A Look at the Provinces III: Hunan
A Look at the Provinces IV: Guangxi
A Look at the Provinces V: Guangdong
A Look at the Provinces VI: Jiangsu
A Look at the Provinces VII: Anhui
A Look at the Provinces VIII: Henan
Hunan Scandal -- Most adoptive families assume that the 2005 Hunan scandal was a one-off, a singular event that was detected and rectified. Readers of the Subscription Blog have access to court records and interviews, including unpublished transcripts, that provide details to the event itself, and the ramifications that event has for China's program overall.
“Information from Hunan I: Thirteen Case Studies” (Court document)
II: Changning Orphanage Director Police Interviews (Court document)
III: Director Chen Ming's Rebuttal of Trafficking Charges (Court document)
An Interview with the Duan Family Matriarch
The Duan Trafficking Logs (Court documents detailing children entering the Changning, Hengdong, Hengshan and Qidong orphanages -- 2000-2005)
Bringing the Hunan Scandal Into Focus (What was it like being a trafficker in the Hunan scandal? What did the directors say, and what was the ole of the police in the scandal? The answers are not what you would expect)
The Impact of the Hunan Scandal on China's Adoption Program (Many theories have been put forth to explain the slowdown in adoptions, but all evidence points to the Hunan scandal as the primary explanation)
It is recognized that these articles contain information that many adoptive families are reluctant to read, and may wish to avoid. However, our philosophy is that truth is a liberating force in our lives, and that as adoptive parents we owe it to our children to gather as much information about their lives, and the background forces at play in their adoption, as possible.
We are very confident you will find a subscription to our blog informative, enlightening, and a significant contributor to your understanding of your child's history, and the China adoption program in general.
Research-China.Org
To be notified of new postings, e-mail me.
We also have a paid subscription blog for families interested in more detailed analysis of China's program. Due to the sensitive nature of these articles, they are available by subscription only. (http://www.research-china.org/blogs/index.htm)
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Monday, April 29, 2013
What We Have, and Why You Need It
April 29, 2013 -- Just up on our subscription blog:
After eight years of blogging myself, this month I turn the keyboard over to my wife Lan. She recounts her experiences researching, and described how her own
life growing up in China informs what she sees and experiences researching orphanages.
If you have not yet subscribed to our subscription blog, you will find it very informative. You can join the conversation through Paypal here:
http://www.research-china.org/blogs/index.htm
_________________________
Finding Ads --Research-China.Org began with the discovery of Guangdong finding ads in 2002. After adopting our daughter Meigon that year, I was refused a copy of her finding ad by the orphanage (as were all adoptive families at that time). We began collecting newspapers, and today have the finding ads for over 100,000 children. Adoptive families are now often provided copies of their child's finding ads at adoption, a response by the Chinese government to our business, but these are often poor-quality xerox copies.
There are several reasons why families should contact us for their child's finding ad, even if they already have a copy. First, it allows us to see if we have other information about your child besides the finding ad itself. In the decade of researching, we have located many foster families, finders, birth families, etc., of many children for whom we don't have contact information. There is no cost or obligation to requesting your child's finding ad, and you may be surprised at what other opportunities we have for you.
Second, the finding ad given to families is sometimes a second or even a third "edition," with previous ads being published with different photos, etc. We have all of these ads, so you may be surprised to learn that another finding ad was published for your child that was not provided you, with an earlier photo of your child that you didn't know existed.
Your child's finding ad is the earliest documentation that exists for your child, and aside from the photo is an important artifact of your child's personal history.
Foster Family Contact Information -- Since 2006 we have been collecting contact information of foster families all across China. These women are anxious to keep informed on how their foster children are doing, share early photos and anecdotes with the adoptive families, etc. If your child is on our list, or you know someone whose child is on the list, please contact us for the direct mailing address of the family. Orphanages habitually work to prevent adoptive families from getting in contact with foster families, so this opportunity is of immense importance to adoptive families.
Birth Parent Search (BPSA)/Orphanage Reliability Analysis (ORA)
-- These two reports are an in-depth look at your child's orphanage,
its adoption history, and its demographic make-up. We believe that by
comparing your child's finding circumstances with those of all the other
children adopted from the same orphanage, very important conclusions
can be drawn that have serious implications for how your child will
understand their history. Both reports provide an important summary of
important data trends and characteristics, and both draw on data from
Baidu searches of area blogs and media sources, contacts in many areas,
finding ad data, and our own research experiences. These reports
concisely present all that is known about your child's orphanage, and
how your child may have come into the orphanage.
Our BPSA is for those adoptive families who are considering a search for their child's birth family, and includes membership in our birth parent search group, the largest group of its kind. On this group are families ranging from "just learning" to those in contact with their child's birth family. The depth of experience of our member families is unparallelled anywhere. Participants in our birth parent search projects are drawn from families that have ordered this report.
The ORA is for families not interested in searching, but wanting more information about their child's orphanage. This report contains a bit more analysis of finding patterns, etc., but is largely the same as our BPSA. A family need only order one of the reports to gain all the information about their child and their orphanage.
Orphanage Data Books -- Forming the foundation of our personalized Birth Parent Search Analysis or Orphanage Reliability Analysis, the orphanage data books contain all of the finding data for the children submitted from the orphanage since 1999 or when the orphanage joined the international adoption program. Arranged chronologically by finding date in table form, the data allows a family to see if other children were found the same day as their child, how many children were found at a child's finding location, how many total children have been adopted, and many other pieces of information. The data is introduced by an informative introduction that provides keys to interpreting the data and drawing conclusions. Nicely bound in hardcover 6x9 format with color illustrations and exhibits, the data book is a very important piece of your child's orphanage history. Most Guangdong orphanages currently available, with Hunan, Jiangxi and Guangxi orphanages coming early 2013.
Subscription Blog -- In 2009 we moved most of our investigative articles to a subscription format to insure that only serious and interested families had access to our experiences and information. Since that time, we have provided over 40 detailed and data-driven articles on adoption patterns in various Provinces, birth family search experiences, parenting strategies for communicating adoption history to children, as well as interviews with orphanage directors, finders, birth families, etc. that provide important "back ground" information to understanding China's adoption program. Our subscription blog is designed to answer questions of active and engaged adoptive families. We try to post monthly, and we offer a 100% satisfaction guarantee that your subscription will be worthwhile. You will learn things you never thought possible.
DVDs/Photos -- Since 2002, Research-China.Org has researched in over 60 orphanages across China. The results of each research project is put to a nice video DVD. Generally, the orphanage itself is profiled, as well as many finding locations and other interesting sites around the city. The DVDs provide a very nice "time capsule" of the area when many of the children lived there, and thus are very important glimpses into our children's pre-adoption lives. A large photo archive is also available, where families can order orphanage, finding location, and other photos of interest.
Maps -- As we have wandered around the various cities and towns of China, we have stopped and collected hundreds of area maps. These are perfect for Life Books, or just to mark with your child's finding location, orphanage, and other important locations. Priced at only $10, they are an exceptional value.
Coffee Table Books -- A recent addition, our orphanage photo books provide a complementary way of presenting your child's history to our DVDs. Beautifully produced, our orphanage books provide gorgeous photos of your child's orphanage area, the orphanage itself, area foster families, and other interesting images. Our books can be customized with your child's finding ad to add that personal touch, making the book "their" book.
Translation Services -- One of the benefits to having a thoroughly experienced native Chinese member on our staff (my wife Lan) is that she is able to provide important translation expertise to our families. If you have something you need accurately translated (foster family letters, adoption documents, police reports, etc.), Lan can help. Lan's expertise is one of the primary reasons an adoptive family should contact us, as she is both extremely knowledgeable about China's orphanages, as well as understanding the cultural view points of both sides of the ocean. She is the heart of the Research-China.Org organization.
__________________
By taking advantage of our research opportunities, an adoptive family will not only learn much regarding their child's pre-adoption history, but also come to thoroughly understand the China program itself. This information will allow an adoptive parent to answer their child's questions with authority, real data and information, allowing the parent to have confidence in their statements to their child. The questions will come; it is up to us as adoptive families to have the information at hand to answer them.
What Research-China.Org Has & Why You Really Need It
Research-China has been around for over ten years, and in that time we have evolved and broadened our offerings to adoptive families. We thought it might be helpful to present what exactly we have to offer families, and why they should seriously consider contacting us for information about their child.Finding Ads --Research-China.Org began with the discovery of Guangdong finding ads in 2002. After adopting our daughter Meigon that year, I was refused a copy of her finding ad by the orphanage (as were all adoptive families at that time). We began collecting newspapers, and today have the finding ads for over 100,000 children. Adoptive families are now often provided copies of their child's finding ads at adoption, a response by the Chinese government to our business, but these are often poor-quality xerox copies.
There are several reasons why families should contact us for their child's finding ad, even if they already have a copy. First, it allows us to see if we have other information about your child besides the finding ad itself. In the decade of researching, we have located many foster families, finders, birth families, etc., of many children for whom we don't have contact information. There is no cost or obligation to requesting your child's finding ad, and you may be surprised at what other opportunities we have for you.
Second, the finding ad given to families is sometimes a second or even a third "edition," with previous ads being published with different photos, etc. We have all of these ads, so you may be surprised to learn that another finding ad was published for your child that was not provided you, with an earlier photo of your child that you didn't know existed.
Your child's finding ad is the earliest documentation that exists for your child, and aside from the photo is an important artifact of your child's personal history.
Foster Family Contact Information -- Since 2006 we have been collecting contact information of foster families all across China. These women are anxious to keep informed on how their foster children are doing, share early photos and anecdotes with the adoptive families, etc. If your child is on our list, or you know someone whose child is on the list, please contact us for the direct mailing address of the family. Orphanages habitually work to prevent adoptive families from getting in contact with foster families, so this opportunity is of immense importance to adoptive families.
Our BPSA is for those adoptive families who are considering a search for their child's birth family, and includes membership in our birth parent search group, the largest group of its kind. On this group are families ranging from "just learning" to those in contact with their child's birth family. The depth of experience of our member families is unparallelled anywhere. Participants in our birth parent search projects are drawn from families that have ordered this report.
The ORA is for families not interested in searching, but wanting more information about their child's orphanage. This report contains a bit more analysis of finding patterns, etc., but is largely the same as our BPSA. A family need only order one of the reports to gain all the information about their child and their orphanage.
Orphanage Data Books -- Forming the foundation of our personalized Birth Parent Search Analysis or Orphanage Reliability Analysis, the orphanage data books contain all of the finding data for the children submitted from the orphanage since 1999 or when the orphanage joined the international adoption program. Arranged chronologically by finding date in table form, the data allows a family to see if other children were found the same day as their child, how many children were found at a child's finding location, how many total children have been adopted, and many other pieces of information. The data is introduced by an informative introduction that provides keys to interpreting the data and drawing conclusions. Nicely bound in hardcover 6x9 format with color illustrations and exhibits, the data book is a very important piece of your child's orphanage history. Most Guangdong orphanages currently available, with Hunan, Jiangxi and Guangxi orphanages coming early 2013.
Subscription Blog -- In 2009 we moved most of our investigative articles to a subscription format to insure that only serious and interested families had access to our experiences and information. Since that time, we have provided over 40 detailed and data-driven articles on adoption patterns in various Provinces, birth family search experiences, parenting strategies for communicating adoption history to children, as well as interviews with orphanage directors, finders, birth families, etc. that provide important "back ground" information to understanding China's adoption program. Our subscription blog is designed to answer questions of active and engaged adoptive families. We try to post monthly, and we offer a 100% satisfaction guarantee that your subscription will be worthwhile. You will learn things you never thought possible.
DVDs/Photos -- Since 2002, Research-China.Org has researched in over 60 orphanages across China. The results of each research project is put to a nice video DVD. Generally, the orphanage itself is profiled, as well as many finding locations and other interesting sites around the city. The DVDs provide a very nice "time capsule" of the area when many of the children lived there, and thus are very important glimpses into our children's pre-adoption lives. A large photo archive is also available, where families can order orphanage, finding location, and other photos of interest.
Maps -- As we have wandered around the various cities and towns of China, we have stopped and collected hundreds of area maps. These are perfect for Life Books, or just to mark with your child's finding location, orphanage, and other important locations. Priced at only $10, they are an exceptional value.
Translation Services -- One of the benefits to having a thoroughly experienced native Chinese member on our staff (my wife Lan) is that she is able to provide important translation expertise to our families. If you have something you need accurately translated (foster family letters, adoption documents, police reports, etc.), Lan can help. Lan's expertise is one of the primary reasons an adoptive family should contact us, as she is both extremely knowledgeable about China's orphanages, as well as understanding the cultural view points of both sides of the ocean. She is the heart of the Research-China.Org organization.
__________________
By taking advantage of our research opportunities, an adoptive family will not only learn much regarding their child's pre-adoption history, but also come to thoroughly understand the China program itself. This information will allow an adoptive parent to answer their child's questions with authority, real data and information, allowing the parent to have confidence in their statements to their child. The questions will come; it is up to us as adoptive families to have the information at hand to answer them.
Monday, November 26, 2012
A History of China's International Adoption Program
Last October, my wife Lan and I were invited to speak to two groups of New York adoptive families, one presentation taking place on Long Island, and the other at NYU in Manhattan. The topic I chose to speak on was "The History of China's International Adoption Program and Its Impact on Birth Parent Searching." This week on the subscription blog is a recital of my presentation in three parts for
ease in viewing.
If you are not a member of our subscription blog, you can join here. The blog is filled with analysis of the different adoption Provinces, interviews with orphanage insiders, recountings from some of our birth parent searching, and other informative and insightful articles. If you wish to fully understand China;s adoption program, the blog will be a great source for you.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
The "A-ha" Moment
Last April I wrote about a new form of adoption corruption that involved orphanages approaching rural residents promising their children better educations if they allowed them to attend "orphanage schools." Once in the orphanage, the children are submitted for international adoption as older, "aging out" children, desperately in need of Western adoptive families. While these children's birth families sometimes are deceived into relinquishing custody of their children to the orphanage, we are now learning that some orphanages are charging birth families to have their children participate in this program, with everyone well aware of what is going on -- everyone except the adoptive families.
Since April, I have been approached by other families who have recounted their own stories, including learning that some of the children being adopted by unknowing families were the children of the orphanage directors themselves, all under the guise of the "special focus" programs promoted by WACAP, CCAI and other agencies.
A few of the impacted families have started speaking up, fighting to bring awareness and change to their agencies and the Chinese government, including the CCCWA itself. Below is a recounting of one such attempt made by two adoptive mothers last month. Their story illustrates the complexity of this situation, and how adoptive families are left to deal with the issues that follow. If you are a family impacted by this problem, please feel free to contact me if you would like to tell your story (anonymously or otherwise), or if you would like to be put into contact with other families dealing with these issues.
What follows was sent to me by an adoptive mother of one of China's "aging out children."
______________________
I have been trying to wrap my brain around all that has happened in the past few weeks. How to write it all out, what to say. How to say it.
The moment when it all became clear. The words were said: "Do not spend time looking to your past, but only look to the future and the opportunity you have in America."
These were the words of the deputy director general of the CCCWA, the highest government official in China adoption. She was touring the U.S., along with several other high officials in China adoption as well as the CEO of the National Council for Adoption in the U.S. One particular official traveling with her was the new director of the Luoyang orphanage.
They would make several stops on their tour, greeting agencies and families. A tour that would land them in a meeting on the West Coast with a large adoption agency within driving distance of my town.
I would never, ever have another opportunity to have these officials all in one room. I knew I had to go, in hopes of my chance to confront them and ask for answers surrounding issues in the adoptions of healthy older children and speak out for truth.
The meeting consisted of a small panel of Chinese adoptees who came home at different ages and were now in their teens-adulthood. They talked of their experiences here. Several of them spoke of their desire to know more about their history, to know more about their birth family and/or medical history. The highest official in adoption listened to them. But instead of validating their feelings of wanting to know their histories, she told them they shouldn't worry about that, but only look toward their future and their opportunities in America, all the while remembering their motherland.
My friend and I looked at each other and said "it all makes sense now." Not only are we not on the same page with the Chinese adoption officials about adoption, we are not even reading the same book. For Americans adoption is often, if not always, a desire for relationship -- a parent/child relationship forever, based on truth and love. Attachment. Hugs and kisses. Sharing the journey. However, all the way across the ocean is a group of officials who are not promoting adoption out of a desire for children to have a family, they are promoting adoption for opportunity and are completely clueless to the damage it can do to deny the past of a child. Sure, a family is part of the deal, but it is not seen in the same way as we see it. For me, family is about relationship regardless of opportunity. A poor family is still a family. If our house burns down and all we have left is each other, that will be enough because we are a family.
(I know, of course, that I'm not speaking for ALL adoptive families. I am aware that some families may be completely fine with adopting a kid solely to give them a better opportunity and perfectly content with it being all about that. I'm just speaking on my general observations. And of course, we all desire opportunity for our kids. You know what I mean, I hope.)
Children who were adopted at a younger age become more westernized having grown up in a relational society here. Their history mostly exists here in America, with only a small piece missing--their birth family. They have a healthy desire to have the puzzle all put together. Their life story, each step of the way. We see this in our younger kids who want all the answers, who like hearing about when they were a baby or the funny things they said when they were young.
Teen adoption from China is a different story. And now it all makes sense. "Don't look back." "Look only toward the future." Opportunity. Those teens who looked into the camera during the "Journey of Hope" Luoyang program and said "I just want a mom and dad, I want a family," were saying what they had been coached to say. Told to hide the past. To never tell the truth. This would provide them opportunity. One more step in where they wanted to go, where the director wanted them to go.
Some children will do just fine in this situation. They will even discover how much they actually DO desire relationships and soak it up. They will embrace their new life---and never look back. However, I don't think they can do this forever. If they open up with the truth, I believe they can do very well providing they have embraced relationships here AND told the truth about their history--which when adopted as a teen "I don't remember" is not a real answer. Trust me, they remember.
However, there is one problem with this, regardless of how the child is doing. The adoption took place under fraud. Lies were told, children were threatened, birth families were given empty promises. Sure, the poverty may have been great in some cases, and it would seem the children would be better off here. However when it is all hidden, and no one wants to talk about it; when children are told to never ever tell and the old director is still communicating with children and telling them to be quiet, the problem remains. It's all a scam! "Like a cult," is the best description I've heard. Social welfare directors might seem gracious and cooperative at face value, but this in no way means that he or she is not involved in corruption.
It's all WRONG.
And so it went. After the delegation finished their talking, we (my friend flew half way across the country to also speak to this group about her case) approached the officials. We presented them with documents from a few families who wanted to stand up for the truth. My very sweet friend translated for us. We told them our stories. We asked for an investigation. We spoke to the current director of the Luoyang orphanage, the deputy general of the CCCWA and the CEO of National Council for Adoption. They all listened with compassion and concern.
Now before anyone panics, please know that NONE of us desire to see the end of adoption. We all love adoption. We love our children. However, we cannot hide the truth out of fear. Not for one second did any of us feel like what we were doing would cause harm. As a matter of fact, for the first time we felt like the truth would be heard and positive change might be made. The top official of the CCCWA looked me in the eye, shook my hand and said, "I'm sorry". They promised to look into things. In the letters that were presented to the officials there were several requests made, all were similar from all families. I'll include a small portion of my letter here:
"We ask for assurance that our children and their families in China as well as the U.S. will be held harmless as a result of the confessions of their true history and that our children will be given the opportunity and welcomed to return to China for a visit with their families if they so desire.
"Our family believes in adoption and is grateful to have our children from China. However, the circumstances surrounding our two Luoyang adoptions have been heartbreaking and painful to our entire family. Our desire is that no other family or child should suffer because of an adoption under false paperwork, and that the integrity of the program would be held to the highest standards to ensure truthfulness and transparency in the children's history before adoption. We would like to see changes within the China program to allow children to stay with their biological families and get the education and training needed to stay with their relatives. We would be fully supportive in implementing programs like these. We would also support the adoption age changing to age 18 so children are not forced to lie about their age."
As a believer in Jesus, I can tell you that not for a second did we doubt that we were in the right place. We felt God's leading every.single.step of the way. No fear. Only peace.
Perhaps changes will be made to ensure the China program is run ethically and clean. A program that is transparent. This would be ideal. Perhaps nothing will be done. One thing I am sure of is that I have done what I could and after a very long time of questioning, it gives me peace that we are exactly where we should be.
I'm not sure what the next step is in this journey, but one thing I do strongly believe is that Christians need to take a stand for truth. No one wants to talk about the corruption out of fear that it may damage the program. I truly believe this is wrong. Children should not be used in adoption, orphans should not be created to fill up numbers in a program. Birth families should have a voice and not be condemned because they don't meet financial social standards. A poor family is still a family. Sometimes we are so focused on "caring for the orphan," we don't realize we are actually contributing to the corruption.
But when I look around, I see it still happening. Take this example:
When he was just six years old, Connor's father died and his mother left him with his aunt. Later he was sent to the orphanage when his aunt could no longer care for him. Connor's Asian name means “he grows up like the hardy white poplar which grows in the north”.
Now 13, Connor is a handsome, healthy boy. When he was younger his caretakers described him as “big eyes bright--he is sunshine, beautiful, and cute boy”. He studies at the local school where he is an excellent student who loves learning. Connor is popular with his caregivers, teachers and classmates. He has a reputation for being helpful to others with chores and caring for younger children. His report says he’s polite and does everything carefully including making his bed, cleaning his room, and making sure he looks nice. He likes playing basketball, drawing and reading books.
Yet, no one says "by the way, it's possible none of this is true and it will be more of an exchange student situation!" It's possible this kid is being used and told to lie forever, enter a new life here and never look back---all the while keeping his connection to home through internet while unsuspecting parents think it's so cute that they have so many friends back in China.
The problem--we don't know. Maybe it IS true that they are orphaned, maybe it really is exactly as it says on paper.
However, knowing what I do now.....seeing orphanage directors send their own kids here, foster families that turn out to be birth parents, family photos (of child and birth family) taken just one week before an adoptive family arrives to get their "orphaned" child, having Civil Affairs Officers willing to take money to enter teens into the "boarding school," children promised educations at Harvard, shall I go on?
Knowing all of this, I cannot advocate for the adoption of these children. I don't think agencies should either. Unless they have thoroughly investigated. But even then, it's impossible to know. There has to be some sort of crackdown as a result of the numerous false adoptions that already took place.
Agencies need to take a stand and stop promoting adoption of children whose paperwork is questionable. They need to hold officials accountable. They should be held accountable. When they see red flags, they need to investigate and put things on hold---and we (those of us in the process) need to step back and not be so emotionally attached to a photo that we are willing to look the other way in order to fill our own need.
This is a complicated matter as there are so many aspects to it. Who defines an orphan? When kids come here that technically don't "need" to--it means other children are left behind. What about them? Who defines the "need" in the first place? Was someone robbed of their chance at a family because someone else took advantage of the opportunity? Have officials now taken the last bit of hope from the true orphan and created a program of opportunity for the elite underprivileged, as well as the already well off? How do you reconcile all this in your mind? That is the question. And it's all complicated.
Here are some red-flags that you should be aware of if you are considering adopting an older child, or have already adopted one:
* If you adopted an older, healthy child, especially a boy from an orphanage that has participated in international adoptions for a long time
* If your child is wanting to be on QQ all the time and has numerous contacts on there. They may be talking to family
* If your child (adopted at an older age, say 10 and up) has been in the orphanage system only a short time
* If you adopted a teen child and s/he is not growing in height---this is a big indicator that they are older. Teen boys---age 13,14...GROW! 16,17,18....not so much.
* If you know other children from the orphanage with the same sort of story: parents died, relatives old and ailing. Especially if those kids are adopted in clusters.
What to do if this is your story:
* TALK to your child. Tell them you have heard about other kids who were adopted and they were actually older and/or their parents weren't really dead and you'd like to know their REAL story. Assure them they don't have to be afraid and you want to help them. Tell them it's ok if they are talking to their family on QQ, you just want to know the truth.
* If you suspect your adopted teen is older, ask them their "sign". Chinese kids know their "sign", this will tell you their birth year.
* Always reassure them that you understand and love them no matter what. If your child sticks to the story on the paperwork, revisit it several months down the road so your child always knows you are open and willing to listen to the truth at any time. While it might be easier, never assume the paperwork is really true.
Truth. Stand for the truth. If you have experienced something similar---speak out about it. Encourage your kids to speak the truth. Do not hide out of fear. The truth will bring about change. Please join the cause.
These problems are not limited to Luoyang; it's happening all over China. Orphanage director's are sending their own children and relatives here under the disguise of an orphan. If you brought home a teen--particularly a teen with no special needs--ask them more questions. Tell them they don't have to be afraid.
Take a stand for ALL the children.
Take a stand for ALL the families.
Take a stand for TRUTH!
_________________
After I posted this essay yesterday, another family with Luoyang children e-mailed me the following recounting of their story.
Well, as far as we are concerned the game is over. Our agency tries to convince us that the "boys" are better off with us. It was suggested twice that we contact another Christian family that is in our same position (2 older non-orphan boys), a family that has decided to keep the truth hidden, because they think their "sons" are better off with them! I don't think that is a judgment call any deceived family has a right to make. Laws were broken. Visa fraud was committed. I don't want to talk to a Christian family that has decided to sweep the truth under the rug. My Bible tells me we need to be "above reproach."
Since April, I have been approached by other families who have recounted their own stories, including learning that some of the children being adopted by unknowing families were the children of the orphanage directors themselves, all under the guise of the "special focus" programs promoted by WACAP, CCAI and other agencies.
A few of the impacted families have started speaking up, fighting to bring awareness and change to their agencies and the Chinese government, including the CCCWA itself. Below is a recounting of one such attempt made by two adoptive mothers last month. Their story illustrates the complexity of this situation, and how adoptive families are left to deal with the issues that follow. If you are a family impacted by this problem, please feel free to contact me if you would like to tell your story (anonymously or otherwise), or if you would like to be put into contact with other families dealing with these issues.
What follows was sent to me by an adoptive mother of one of China's "aging out children."
______________________
I have been trying to wrap my brain around all that has happened in the past few weeks. How to write it all out, what to say. How to say it.
The moment when it all became clear. The words were said: "Do not spend time looking to your past, but only look to the future and the opportunity you have in America."
These were the words of the deputy director general of the CCCWA, the highest government official in China adoption. She was touring the U.S., along with several other high officials in China adoption as well as the CEO of the National Council for Adoption in the U.S. One particular official traveling with her was the new director of the Luoyang orphanage.
They would make several stops on their tour, greeting agencies and families. A tour that would land them in a meeting on the West Coast with a large adoption agency within driving distance of my town.
I would never, ever have another opportunity to have these officials all in one room. I knew I had to go, in hopes of my chance to confront them and ask for answers surrounding issues in the adoptions of healthy older children and speak out for truth.
The meeting consisted of a small panel of Chinese adoptees who came home at different ages and were now in their teens-adulthood. They talked of their experiences here. Several of them spoke of their desire to know more about their history, to know more about their birth family and/or medical history. The highest official in adoption listened to them. But instead of validating their feelings of wanting to know their histories, she told them they shouldn't worry about that, but only look toward their future and their opportunities in America, all the while remembering their motherland.
My friend and I looked at each other and said "it all makes sense now." Not only are we not on the same page with the Chinese adoption officials about adoption, we are not even reading the same book. For Americans adoption is often, if not always, a desire for relationship -- a parent/child relationship forever, based on truth and love. Attachment. Hugs and kisses. Sharing the journey. However, all the way across the ocean is a group of officials who are not promoting adoption out of a desire for children to have a family, they are promoting adoption for opportunity and are completely clueless to the damage it can do to deny the past of a child. Sure, a family is part of the deal, but it is not seen in the same way as we see it. For me, family is about relationship regardless of opportunity. A poor family is still a family. If our house burns down and all we have left is each other, that will be enough because we are a family.
(I know, of course, that I'm not speaking for ALL adoptive families. I am aware that some families may be completely fine with adopting a kid solely to give them a better opportunity and perfectly content with it being all about that. I'm just speaking on my general observations. And of course, we all desire opportunity for our kids. You know what I mean, I hope.)
Children who were adopted at a younger age become more westernized having grown up in a relational society here. Their history mostly exists here in America, with only a small piece missing--their birth family. They have a healthy desire to have the puzzle all put together. Their life story, each step of the way. We see this in our younger kids who want all the answers, who like hearing about when they were a baby or the funny things they said when they were young.
Teen adoption from China is a different story. And now it all makes sense. "Don't look back." "Look only toward the future." Opportunity. Those teens who looked into the camera during the "Journey of Hope" Luoyang program and said "I just want a mom and dad, I want a family," were saying what they had been coached to say. Told to hide the past. To never tell the truth. This would provide them opportunity. One more step in where they wanted to go, where the director wanted them to go.
Some children will do just fine in this situation. They will even discover how much they actually DO desire relationships and soak it up. They will embrace their new life---and never look back. However, I don't think they can do this forever. If they open up with the truth, I believe they can do very well providing they have embraced relationships here AND told the truth about their history--which when adopted as a teen "I don't remember" is not a real answer. Trust me, they remember.
However, there is one problem with this, regardless of how the child is doing. The adoption took place under fraud. Lies were told, children were threatened, birth families were given empty promises. Sure, the poverty may have been great in some cases, and it would seem the children would be better off here. However when it is all hidden, and no one wants to talk about it; when children are told to never ever tell and the old director is still communicating with children and telling them to be quiet, the problem remains. It's all a scam! "Like a cult," is the best description I've heard. Social welfare directors might seem gracious and cooperative at face value, but this in no way means that he or she is not involved in corruption.
It's all WRONG.
And so it went. After the delegation finished their talking, we (my friend flew half way across the country to also speak to this group about her case) approached the officials. We presented them with documents from a few families who wanted to stand up for the truth. My very sweet friend translated for us. We told them our stories. We asked for an investigation. We spoke to the current director of the Luoyang orphanage, the deputy general of the CCCWA and the CEO of National Council for Adoption. They all listened with compassion and concern.
Now before anyone panics, please know that NONE of us desire to see the end of adoption. We all love adoption. We love our children. However, we cannot hide the truth out of fear. Not for one second did any of us feel like what we were doing would cause harm. As a matter of fact, for the first time we felt like the truth would be heard and positive change might be made. The top official of the CCCWA looked me in the eye, shook my hand and said, "I'm sorry". They promised to look into things. In the letters that were presented to the officials there were several requests made, all were similar from all families. I'll include a small portion of my letter here:
"We ask for a formal apology from all
who participated in the deception and threatening of our children and
those who participated in aiding them to do so.
"We ask for assurance that our children and their families in China as well as the U.S. will be held harmless as a result of the confessions of their true history and that our children will be given the opportunity and welcomed to return to China for a visit with their families if they so desire.
"Our family believes in adoption and is grateful to have our children from China. However, the circumstances surrounding our two Luoyang adoptions have been heartbreaking and painful to our entire family. Our desire is that no other family or child should suffer because of an adoption under false paperwork, and that the integrity of the program would be held to the highest standards to ensure truthfulness and transparency in the children's history before adoption. We would like to see changes within the China program to allow children to stay with their biological families and get the education and training needed to stay with their relatives. We would be fully supportive in implementing programs like these. We would also support the adoption age changing to age 18 so children are not forced to lie about their age."
As a believer in Jesus, I can tell you that not for a second did we doubt that we were in the right place. We felt God's leading every.single.step of the way. No fear. Only peace.
Perhaps changes will be made to ensure the China program is run ethically and clean. A program that is transparent. This would be ideal. Perhaps nothing will be done. One thing I am sure of is that I have done what I could and after a very long time of questioning, it gives me peace that we are exactly where we should be.
I'm not sure what the next step is in this journey, but one thing I do strongly believe is that Christians need to take a stand for truth. No one wants to talk about the corruption out of fear that it may damage the program. I truly believe this is wrong. Children should not be used in adoption, orphans should not be created to fill up numbers in a program. Birth families should have a voice and not be condemned because they don't meet financial social standards. A poor family is still a family. Sometimes we are so focused on "caring for the orphan," we don't realize we are actually contributing to the corruption.
But when I look around, I see it still happening. Take this example:
When he was just six years old, Connor's father died and his mother left him with his aunt. Later he was sent to the orphanage when his aunt could no longer care for him. Connor's Asian name means “he grows up like the hardy white poplar which grows in the north”.
Now 13, Connor is a handsome, healthy boy. When he was younger his caretakers described him as “big eyes bright--he is sunshine, beautiful, and cute boy”. He studies at the local school where he is an excellent student who loves learning. Connor is popular with his caregivers, teachers and classmates. He has a reputation for being helpful to others with chores and caring for younger children. His report says he’s polite and does everything carefully including making his bed, cleaning his room, and making sure he looks nice. He likes playing basketball, drawing and reading books.
Yet, no one says "by the way, it's possible none of this is true and it will be more of an exchange student situation!" It's possible this kid is being used and told to lie forever, enter a new life here and never look back---all the while keeping his connection to home through internet while unsuspecting parents think it's so cute that they have so many friends back in China.
The problem--we don't know. Maybe it IS true that they are orphaned, maybe it really is exactly as it says on paper.
However, knowing what I do now.....seeing orphanage directors send their own kids here, foster families that turn out to be birth parents, family photos (of child and birth family) taken just one week before an adoptive family arrives to get their "orphaned" child, having Civil Affairs Officers willing to take money to enter teens into the "boarding school," children promised educations at Harvard, shall I go on?
Knowing all of this, I cannot advocate for the adoption of these children. I don't think agencies should either. Unless they have thoroughly investigated. But even then, it's impossible to know. There has to be some sort of crackdown as a result of the numerous false adoptions that already took place.
Agencies need to take a stand and stop promoting adoption of children whose paperwork is questionable. They need to hold officials accountable. They should be held accountable. When they see red flags, they need to investigate and put things on hold---and we (those of us in the process) need to step back and not be so emotionally attached to a photo that we are willing to look the other way in order to fill our own need.
This is a complicated matter as there are so many aspects to it. Who defines an orphan? When kids come here that technically don't "need" to--it means other children are left behind. What about them? Who defines the "need" in the first place? Was someone robbed of their chance at a family because someone else took advantage of the opportunity? Have officials now taken the last bit of hope from the true orphan and created a program of opportunity for the elite underprivileged, as well as the already well off? How do you reconcile all this in your mind? That is the question. And it's all complicated.
Here are some red-flags that you should be aware of if you are considering adopting an older child, or have already adopted one:
* If you adopted an older, healthy child, especially a boy from an orphanage that has participated in international adoptions for a long time
* If your child is wanting to be on QQ all the time and has numerous contacts on there. They may be talking to family
* If your child (adopted at an older age, say 10 and up) has been in the orphanage system only a short time
* If you adopted a teen child and s/he is not growing in height---this is a big indicator that they are older. Teen boys---age 13,14...GROW! 16,17,18....not so much.
* If you know other children from the orphanage with the same sort of story: parents died, relatives old and ailing. Especially if those kids are adopted in clusters.
What to do if this is your story:
* TALK to your child. Tell them you have heard about other kids who were adopted and they were actually older and/or their parents weren't really dead and you'd like to know their REAL story. Assure them they don't have to be afraid and you want to help them. Tell them it's ok if they are talking to their family on QQ, you just want to know the truth.
* If you suspect your adopted teen is older, ask them their "sign". Chinese kids know their "sign", this will tell you their birth year.
* Always reassure them that you understand and love them no matter what. If your child sticks to the story on the paperwork, revisit it several months down the road so your child always knows you are open and willing to listen to the truth at any time. While it might be easier, never assume the paperwork is really true.
Truth. Stand for the truth. If you have experienced something similar---speak out about it. Encourage your kids to speak the truth. Do not hide out of fear. The truth will bring about change. Please join the cause.
These problems are not limited to Luoyang; it's happening all over China. Orphanage director's are sending their own children and relatives here under the disguise of an orphan. If you brought home a teen--particularly a teen with no special needs--ask them more questions. Tell them they don't have to be afraid.
Take a stand for ALL the children.
Take a stand for ALL the families.
Take a stand for TRUTH!
_________________
After I posted this essay yesterday, another family with Luoyang children e-mailed me the following recounting of their story.
We
are victims of the "Journey of Hope" child laundering scam. After almost
two years of being in our family, our two Luoyang "boys" told us they
are much older (almost 20 instead of 15, and almost 19 instead of 17).
They were too old to leave China as orphans and they were too old to
enter the USA as adopted children. Worse, they confessed that they are
not orphans.
They claim that their families are not even poor. They
would have been "okay" in China. We asked why they helped to deceive
us. "I just wanted to come to the U.S. I know I don't belong here.
The paperwork is all lies." The other "son" is running away from a
challenging situation at home. We have shared everything with our
agency. They claim to care, but two days before the Chinese delegation
visited the agency, I asked the agency to put our letter detailing our
situation into the hands of the Chinese officials. I also told the
agency that our Luoyang young men were ready to tell the agency how the
fraud and deception were carried out against the agency and against
adoptive parents. Didn't our agency want this information BEFORE the
delegation arrived, so that the agency would know more before discussing
the Luoyang "inconsistencies" and "discrepancies" with the Chinese
delegation?
There was no response from the agency. So, the courageous
women who put letters into the hands of the Chinese adoption officials
also delivered our letter.
My husband and I refuse to live a lie. This is a clear case of
child laundering, and we are going to do our best to report it, expose
it, and fight it. I imagine there are some Chinese families that now
regret making the decision to give their children to the "Journey of Hope"
scheme. We hope "adoptees" can be reunited with their families. Our
one "son" recently pulled out pictures of his "real" family, pictures he
has kept hidden since coming home with us in 2010. It was a strange
moment to hear about his "real family." This is the boy who looked into
the agency camera, as he was being videotaped for the "Journey of Hope"
program, and said he just wanted "a family of his own." It was a
performance that made my husband almost cry. It made my husband decide
we should pursue the "Journey of Hope" adoption. Now we know our "poor,
traumatized, disadvantaged orphan boy" HAS a family of his own. All his
aunts and his uncle came to say good-bye the week before we arrived in
China to "adopt" him.
Now I know why he has yet to learn how to spell his new mother's
name -- my name. I am not his mother. Never will be. His real mother is
alive and living outside Luoyang. I am just the stupid overweight
American female who is feeding, educating, doctoring, clothing,
entertaining, etc. him. The facts about the second "son" is just as
depressing. Neither "son" is afraid of former Director Pei. Neither is
afraid that something will happen to his family if the truth is told.
Well, as far as we are concerned the game is over. Our agency tries to convince us that the "boys" are better off with us. It was suggested twice that we contact another Christian family that is in our same position (2 older non-orphan boys), a family that has decided to keep the truth hidden, because they think their "sons" are better off with them! I don't think that is a judgment call any deceived family has a right to make. Laws were broken. Visa fraud was committed. I don't want to talk to a Christian family that has decided to sweep the truth under the rug. My Bible tells me we need to be "above reproach."
The second agency strategy to deter us from pursuing the
truth: Aren't we concerned about, gasp, deportation? Aren't we
concerned about, gasp, retribution against the birth families? No. We
are concerned about the other three TRUE children in our family who have
been cheated and hurt by this wretched deception. Our children are
watching to see what we do with this terrible crime. We are concerned
about the other honest, loving American families about to buy the lie.
The fear tactics don't work here.
Well, third strategy -- Don't we understand that there is no foster
care system in China? "Boys" like ours are "at risk," even if they are
not orphans. Both of our Luoyang young men were attending school,
living with family, eating well, growing up fine. The assumption that
the "Journey of Hope" "kids" are needy needs to be seriously questioned.
In our case, both "kids" and their families were driven by GREED, not
need. The tens of thousands of dollars we spent for the pleasure of
being manipulated and deceived could have gone a LONG, LONG way to
helping scores of "at risk" kids, really at risk kids. Besides the
shock and grief of finding out we have been completely defrauded, we
mourn the fact that two REAL orphans did not get adopted by our family.
But we know God is in control. He did not cause this, but he
permitted it to happen to our family. SO THAT WE COULD FIGHT THIS ABUSE
of children, Chinese families, and American families.
We refuse to live the lie. We will not perjure ourselves and we
will not encourage these young men in our care to perjure
themselves. This is a hideous mockery of adoption. We are pursuing the
truth. I wish the families that have decided to accept the lie would
change their minds.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)